so this whole week has been so horrible!!! i work chris up early monday morning at 4 a.m. to tell him i was really dizzy and weird so i slept in his room with him. then ending up throwing up a few time before 7:20 when i called in sick to work 10 minutes before i had to be to work. then spent the rest of the day laying on chris floor. i layed their from 7:20 till 4 when chris got home from work b/c i was so dizzy i couldn't move. so he came home and got me up and helped me to the bathroom, then carried me to his bed where i slept from 4ish to 11 when he got home from class. then he woke me up and actually spoon fed me fruit out of a can b/c i couldn't move. then during the night i slept in chris' room b/c its closer to the bathroom i got up and threwup 5 times during the middle of the night. well basically that's the end of the story. its thursday night and this is still going on but i'm much better then i was before. i have my appetite back now. i just ate a whole hershey's bar a whole 230 calories. but i'm just making up for all the weigh i lost. but i was really really sick. i layed in his room for 3 days straight. poor guy. but he did very good. he took suck good care of me. he had to feed me, help me to the bathroom, and help me in and out of bed when i need to throwup. i really thankful i had him!!!
but i'm still sick. i've missed 2 days of work so far.and i'm missing tomorrow. i'm going to try to go back to work saturday, but i don't know with all the dizzy spells i keep having. i've thrownup 12 times since monday
my dad took me to the doctor tuesday b/c i was so sick and she couldn't figure out what was wrong with me - she tested me for dehydration, concusion, inner ear infection and even checked to see if i was pregnaunt which i'm not!!!! so ... i have to get a catscan done wednesday. i was suppose to have it done today but my insurance didn't approve it in time. my doctor thinks their might be something wrong with my brian. something about the center of my brian and something making me dizzy and have to keep throwing up. uh so i don't know i'm really scared!!!!! i dont' even know what to expect i guess.
i was suppose to see a blood specialist yesterday but i had to reschedual b/c i was still really sick and throwing up, so i'll be seeing him on wednesday too. espeically now b/c i'm on my second period this month. and i've been down this road before junior year....where i bled for 4 months straight and it sucked it was 4 months of having your period striaght!
uh but i just wanted to vent i guess....mostly b/c i'm really scared.
does anyone like panara bread?? b/c i'm craving it bad!
so i'm not sure if anyone even reads this anymore, but i'm gonna post anyways. i have a lot of things going on right now, and i can't exaclty handle all of it. i'm super stressed out, and yeah i know everyone gets a little stressed out from time to time, but i feel well depressed. yeah i feel like i'm going through depression right now, and all of my family knows about it, and their trying to help. but i don't know if it is something you can help. maybe i just have to try and help myself you know? i've gotten to the point where i hate leaving my house. i don't want to go out. i don't want to see friends. i don't want to do anything. i'm just tired all the time. i go to bed about 10 or 11. i wake up at 6:30 every single day but sunday. and when i'm done with work, or class, i take a 3 hour nap. and i do the same thing over and over again. i'm looking for a new job right now, something different. something to be different. but maybe i was ment to be a cashier all my life. maybe. i don't want anyone to take this the wrong way when i say i don't want to see friends, because i do. it's just hard to drag myself out of bed, and get ready to do go out. i know a lot of this isn't because i'm depressed at all. it's because i'm sick. being sick makes me depressed. i'm not sick like cancer or anything. just annemic. but it's the worst it's ever been right now. it just makes me tired ALL the time, makes me have super dark circles under my eyes, makes me get colds & sick super often it seems like just as i'm getting over something some new thing comes along because i don't have enuff white blood cells, oo and i'm starting to lose a lot of hair - yeah that's fun. on average i go to the doctors office like um 3 to 4 times a month b/c i'm always sick. march 1st i have to see a blood specialist b/c my bloods really bad right now. i have to see the specialist b/c they have to fix me up. they want to give me iron shots, but my doctor says they can be kinda risky, and dangerous at times, so that kinda scares me, and it scared me to think about getting a blood transfusion. not that i need one right now, but i'm slowly getting to that point.
but i just wanted to let you all know what i was dealing with right now, b/c thats what friends do, they listen. so if you need to talk, always know i'm hear guys, i promise i'll stay awake.
good night everyone!
p.s. i didn't GO to the concert tonight. my ticket plans fell throught. well u see my manager at work jeff has a brother who is dating the assistant to the big guy at the questcenter, and she always gets tickets to the concerts, and he'd know right before the show if she could give out presale tickets. but turns out nickelback didn't have presale tickets, so then i just fell a sleep and work up a bit ago, and watched some mtv wild and out which i don't really care for, and now, i'm off to sleep b/c i have to work 9-5 tomorrow which i'm not looking forward to.
so i've just been thinking lately, and sometime life isn't fair. we're all so wrapped up in oooo she said this about me, and blah blah blah, and we don't worry about whats really going on, and it kills me inside.
thier are so many people in this world that have 12389239 times greater the problems then we do. and all we care about is ourselves. we worry about stupid stuff like what am i gonna buy at the mall this week w/ my paycheck, or i have a headache so that gives me the right to be a bitch.
we don't worry about those people out there that wonder where their next gasp of air is gonna come from, or how their family is going to survive on one loaf a bread threwout the week.
i think about this stuff all the time, and i try to better my life from it, i've learned to let things go, and to rid out all the drama. i try to keep my personal problems to myself, knowing that their are worse things in life.
and a constant replay of my aunt runs threw my mind 24/7, knowing the pain that she feels, sometime i wonder how she keeps going everyday.
i go to my aunt and unlce's house every sunday night, and just watch my aunt cry, and cry with her, its sad that bad things happen to good people. she has to be in the hospital over christmas, but i'll be there with her.
sometime i just wish people would care more about other people and stop worrying about themselves your know
tonight was really relaxing, i went over to andy's house for his and jordans welcome home thingy. it was really nice seeing them. i really miss haning out with those boys, including jeremy.
tonight i noticed everyone has changed a lot. but for the better. everyone just seems more grownup now. it makes me think, "have i changed at all?" personally i'd say no i haven't but that's my point of view. i don't think i've had the experiece to change yet. like jordan and andy went away to the marines, and lived in a different state, and we're away from their family. and like john, and bryan, they get the college expeirence. i just think my expeirence hasen't came yet.
woah well i haven't updated in a while. but it seems like
everyone is pretty much drifted away from lj, and on to myspace, but
not me, cuz well i can't exactly figure it out :-< embarrassing i
know. but as for my life, it's packed full with plenty of work
& school. and this past week has just been terrible, cuz my
parents are out of town relaxingly cruising the carribbean. and i'm
at home majorly stressed out, and i haven't even had time for a party
cuz i've been so-o busy.
i'm going to the bowling for soup concert tomorrow,and your suppose to
wear a halloween costume; and my costume i was making didn't turn out,
so now i'm settling to be a cowgirl. i made a cute card table
for chris cuz he's a card dealer.
monday is my birthday, which means i can officially buy powerball
tickets, which doesn't sounds like a big deal, but at my work, it's
like the talk of the breakroom, and i'd like to be apart of that talk,
i can't go on doing the jumble in the paper for ever you know. i
do have my birthday off which is a major surpirse b/c i close
every monday night, so its like a win win situation pretty much.
except i'm not doing anything b/c chris is going to the cottonmouth
kings concert, which yeah i'm upset about but i can't stress over it
forever. and i don't think i'll fit in at a cottonmouth kings concert
well mostly because i pass on grass, and i don't want to enjoy my
birthday with the fine musical talent of pot heads rapping about well
blueberry yum yum, and the tuka, so yeah i'm good.
OMG it's feeling like fall! ah i'm excited! i love this weather, just wearing a hoodie, wow its almost like a slice of heaven. okay maybe not heaven but you get the drift right? well i must say october is my fave month one because my birthday, two because all those little kids look so sticken cute in their halloween outfits, three hay rack rides, and four attempting to go to haunted houses, if i don't get the shit scared out of me in line that is.
anyway i herd on the radio that bowling for soup is coming here but i don't know when but what i do know is that you can buy your tickets at gamers, and that its a halloween party and you dress up and you could win 1,000. which i'm not a huge fan of bowling for soup, but the dressing up part and partying sounds cool, and i think it would be fun to do for my birthday, so i was wondering what you guys think...hummm...
well let me know...
p.s. i wanna know where miss amy young has been all my life? i <3 u
so i went to kansas to see my dad this weekend and let me tell you about this weekend, b/c the majority of it was very hellish. it all started with the drive, somehow my mother and aunt can turn a 3 1/2 drive into a 6 hour drive! sick! not to mention i get car sick, my 2 little screaming cousins sitting behind me saying "are we there yet" um only every other mile, not to mention every other sentence being "i have to pee" or "i'm thirsty" so we'd prolly stopped like 3 times alone for them. then we finally find our hotel, and well what do u know its ghetto. seriously me and my aunt wanted to sleep in the mini van - ha yeah thats another thing we traveled via mini van, and my aunts a freaking speeder...so could you even imagine a maroon mini van passing you at 95? ha let me give you a minute for that to sink in.
okay well anyways then we get ready and head off to fort riely to see my daddy. well we surely got lost on base, and ended off post twice. but good news is we finally found my daddy! yeah! and then we took him to dinner. at 1 our of 2 resturants within the 3 towns we were in. (ogden, manhatten, & junction city) NOW i know ks state is a big party school. well we went to famous daves. then in the morning me and my aunt went to number 2 resturant cracker barrell. which isn't good! its very nasty!
then on the way home... my mom and aunt had a brilliant idea to stop at ne crossing to take the babies to the toy store, well yeah time to go back home and what do u know our lovely mini van doesn't start, we asked like 15 people to jump start us and no one would, finally 1 and 1/2 later a guy gives us one but it still won't start, so then this elderly man tried too and it won't start, so we waited another hour, and nope nothing, so here comes my uncle to get us, and he calls and says "put it in neutral and try to start it" yeap that worked! so after 2 1/2 hours in the freaking heat we make our way home.
then to top it off after we dropped my aunt tina off and her kids, we had to go to the carwash, and vacuum it out b/c we had wind paint all over it saying "welcome home sfc burden" and my cousins got gum and crackers all over.
ahhh it was a bad weekend except for the fact i seen my daddy!
just cuz i'm sUper dUper excitted i just felt that i needed to tell you girles that my DAD is coming home this week. well not home, home, but to fort reiley kansas. but he'll surely be home next week, unless he has to go aid troops in new orleans. ahhh i'm happy!
so tonight my brother had his birthday party, well him and his friends went paintballing at a place on 90th and maple.
well my mom prepaid for 10 people to go, but 2 of his friends bailed on him so, i went b/c my uncle and his friend talked me into it.
well i must say i was all for it b/c i hadn't done this before.
i mean it was fun and all, and i wasen't half bad, i mean i nailed some of those boys, but also i got nailed myself, i mean i may have a few welts but it was fun.
we played like 12 games, i got hit on my wrist, cheek, neck, both my shoulders, and my leg.
in all it was a pretty cool NEW experience,
and i know my mom got her money's worth, b/c i drilled my uncle where the sun don't shine.
so if your ever in the mood to play paintball, u should do it, i think you'd like it.
well i'm off to shower then bed, but i thought i'd share this memorable event with you all,
as for me, i don't think i'll sleep theres 6 boys spending the night here, and their gross and loud.
well so far my first
day off class was pretty good, i wished i knew more people, but that's
what college is all about, meeting new people, well i guess your forced
to pay to learn stuff also. i did have a few people in class i
knew tho, such as ryan howery in my first class, brett ruffner in my
second class, and ang, brandon draper, and alex (chrissy's alex) in my
last class. i did have homework, but my book is sold out, so idk
what i'm gonna do. i took like the stupidest math class in the
WORLD i absolutely don't know what i was thinking, i paid to take like a
3rd graders level math! ahhhh i'm flabbergasted about that. but
metro resembles highschool way to much for me, the classes are to small
to the point where you would get to know everyone, and i still see like
our whole highschool walking around inside or in the parking lot.
i guess i really wish i could get a college experience, but it just
wasen't possible when my dad was gone, but he'll be home in a few
weeks, so maybe i'll get my dream sooner or later, prolly later
tho. really the only thing different about it is you have like 40
and 50 year olds just chillen in your class, but they like to sit in
from i came to realize. and trying to teach a 40 year old algebra
is really gonna be a big problem, i can see it already, everyone just
laughed at her, but um it wasen't that funny. anyways i'm not sure i
can last sitting 2 hours in one class, but it's nice being able to walk
out to go to restroom or answer you phone whenever you need to.
but i thought in college they didn't take attendance, well i was WRONG
cuz you can only have 4 absences then you get drop! y should it
matter, its my money...well anyways heres a picture of my baby! i
<3 ya guys
megan marie hughes <-----yeah pretty much my fave person in the world
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ashleynicole86's journal
sick
exhausted
costumized out
hungry
ames! 
thankful
blah
megan marie hughes <-----yeah pretty much my fave person in the world